When I was a teenager, my older cousin became an aunt. It hit me then, since I’m an only child, I'd never have a niece or nephew. My mom said I could be an aunt through marriage, but I said it wouldn't be the same.
Until I started dating Grant. He already had a
four-year old nephew when I met him. I loved Jason from the beginning. He was a
cute kid and the nephew I never thought I’d have. He became a Christian in his
teens and grew into a fun young man with a great sense of humor.
Until ten years ago, in his late
twenties, he became a different person. Unkempt, angry, and distant. He stopped
working, moved in with a family member, and basically became a hermit. We were
a bit slow to realize the change in him came from drug use. Determined not to
enable him and with a young, impressionable son to think about, Grant and I
took the tough love route, and basically cut Jason out of our lives.
We only saw him at the few
family gatherings he was clean enough to attend over the years. It was painful
to see the shadow of himself he’d become. Through those years, I prayed for
him. But as time wore on, I gave up on him, wrote him off, decided he was too
far gone and we’d never get him back. I still prayed, but I basically only went
through the motions, expecting nothing to change, and that we’d eventually get
a phone call that he was dead.
But I forgot how big God is.
Jason got caught – not for the first time – but on a more serious charge than
in the past. This time, no one bailed him out for three months. And while he sat in jail, God
got a hold of him. We were skeptical. He went to court and got five years
parole with weekly drug tests he can’t fake his way through. If he messes up
once, he goes to prison.
Once he got out of jail, he came
to church the next Wednesday night. He was clean, neat, well-groomed, and
smelled good. I hugged him and told him how happy I was to see him there. That
I expected him to come on Sunday morning and night too. He promised he would.
He did and kept coming. I was still skeptical. He attended Celebrate Recovery
at another church and the only time he missed ours was when he went to services
with his CR friends.
As time passed, I saw a change. He
got a job and got his own place. He went to the altar, prayed out loud, and
started teaching our teens class. I stopped being skeptical, told him I was
proud of him, and started enjoying him. At family gatherings, going to movies
together, and eating out for lunch. I’d forgotten how much I missed him and
routinely cry just from the joy of having him back.
This past year, we celebrated family birthdays, Thanksgiving, and Christmas with Jason. He’s thirty-nine now and
he’s been clean for over a year. He's still in church, attends weekly chapel services at a local Christ-based drug rehab facility, has gotten involved in a jail ministry, and recently started a Bible study for ex-addicts.
Life lesson learned - If you
have a family member on drugs, don’t give up on them. I don't regret the tough love route, but I do regret writing Jason off. God is bigger than drugs.
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Look for her next Love Inspired title, Winning over the Cowboy, available for preorder on March 21st!
Thanks for sharing Jason's story. God is indeed bigger than any of our problems.
ReplyDeleteI'm so proud of him. Writing this post got me teary all over again. Sharing family gatherings, special days, and holidays with him has been so very special. He's so funny and a joy to be around. The other day, after a gathering for my mother-in-law's birthday, our fifteen year old son said, "I'm so glad Jason's doing what he's supposed to now."
ReplyDeleteGod can use Jason's testimony mightily!!!!
ReplyDeleteThis belongs in a book, Chicken Soup for the Soul or something similar. I have a Jason in my life, and you touched a nerve.
ReplyDeleteHe is, Jennifer. Jason's been a great inspiration and encouragement to others.
ReplyDeleteI hadn't thought about Chicken Soup, Pamela. I have thought of a character in a future book though. Don't give up on your Jason. God can handle him or her.