If you're one of those people who set grand goals that you're never quite able to achieve, maybe it's time to go...small. Instead of vowing to lose thirty pounds, what if, as an alternative, you decided to eat a protein-rich breakfast instead of only drinking coffee? That's it. Just one small change. My brother-in-law lost fifteen pounds the year he decided to forgo the fries when they were available, and order the vegetable side dish instead. That's all he did! But that small change led to others. If you drink two sodas a day, try to drink only one.
Research has shown us that making small, incremental changes can make a bigger impact on our lives than a grand resolution that's difficult to maintain. If you want to organize the whole house, start by making your bed each morning. If you're trying to save money, but you can never manage to keep a budget, resolve to deduct $10 from each paycheck and put that money into savings.
Instead of thinking big, think small. And don't be afraid to reward yourself! Human beings are better at short-term goals. If you want a write a book, resolve to write 10 words a day...then, if that works out, write a 100.
I'll be honest, I spent most of my life setting huge goals with lackluster results. Then I decided to think small...If I have a goal, I make small, incremental changes leading to that goal.
I'm going to give you some homework that will make anyone's year better. Say something nice to yourself each day. Just one nice thing each day. Tell yourself you look pretty! Tell yourself you're a good cook! Anything. We all tend to be too hard on ourselves. We'd never talk to someone we love the way we talk to ourselves.
What about you? Do you start out with grand goals and never quite seem to be able to keep them? Or are you able to set realistic goals?
To living your best life in 2019!
Sherri Shackelford
A former naval reservist with a top-secret security clearance, Sherri writes rapid-fire suspense featuring captivating characters and heart-pounding romance. She's authored more than a dozen novels for Harlequin publishing, including both historical and contemporary suspense.
Visit her Website, or follow her on social media:
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After forensic accountant Beth Greenwood uncovers a money-laundering scheme tying her company to the organization that murdered her mentor, she knows she needs to go into hiding. With ruthless killers in pursuit, she’s forced to rely on homeland security agent Corbin Ross’s protection—even as his investigation suggests Beth is complicit in embezzlement. Can their uneasy alliance develop into something deeper—and keep them alive?
NO SAFE PLACE
He lives by the law.
She’s running for her life.
After forensic accountant Beth Greenwood uncovers a money-laundering scheme tying her company to the organization that murdered her mentor, she knows she needs to go into hiding. With ruthless killers in pursuit, she’s forced to rely on homeland security agent Corbin Ross’s protection—even as his investigation suggests Beth is complicit in embezzlement. Can their uneasy alliance develop into something deeper—and keep them alive?
I love this idea, Sherri. I have a tendency of setting goals to accomplish more than I can and I end up having to constantly redo them. I'm slowly trying to set smaller, more reachable goals for myself.
ReplyDeleteThere's something really encouraging about success...even if it's a little success. I wanted to start exercising more this year, so I started by stretching each morning before I sat down to write. That felt so good...I started using the treadmill. It's weird how those little things snowball.
DeleteExcellent advice. I’m going to try this. At least when I fail, it will be a small failure! How’s that for optimism?!!
ReplyDeleteIt's a great start!! (Love your name, by the way!) And don't forget to say something nice to yourself today :)
DeleteI do set some lofty goals, but sometimes I am able to reach them. Your way, though, I've never thought about. I must think about this. But you are so right about how horrible we treat ourselves. I must find a way to change that!
ReplyDeleteFirst, awesome that you've achieved those big goals! Compliment yourself. Be proud!!! *You* are the person we're all trying to become. :) There's a beauty of knowing, "Hey, I did this once. I can do it again!"
DeleteGreat post!
ReplyDeleteI'm focusing on goals that are within my control. For example, instead of "I'm going to lose two pounds this week" my goal is "I'm going to write down everything I eat this week."
That's perfect! Keep us posted on how it's going :)
DeleteHi Sherri! You're right. Most of us are too hard on ourselves. Women tend to be self-deprecating. I talk about that when mentoring new writers about how to create authentic heroines. Women never think of themselves as totally put together...we've got bad hair, too many extra pounds, not enough color in our cheeks, the wrong shade of lipstick...whatever! I tend to think men are more positive in their self-assessments, although I may be wrong. Anyone want to weigh in on guys?
ReplyDeleteI like your idea of doing self-affirmation each day! An achievable resolution for 2019.
I totally agree. Watch football players. You'd never see a woman beating on her chest like Tarzan, LOL. You never see negative memes from guys, either. Testosterone, perhaps?
DeleteHi Sherri. This post was RIGHT on for me. I've been a negative thinker all my life and I think it's really affected me in not-so-good ways. So I'm speaking positive self-thoughts this year. I also love your idea of making smaller goals. I still have my big goals, but I'm asking myself what I can do THIS WEEK that will get me one step closer. And as far as exercise, I listen to self-help and business audio books. #Burn&Learn
ReplyDeleteI totally get it. It's a hard habit to break. There's a book called, "What to Say When You Talk to Yourself" that really helped me. (Hey - books have all the answers!)
DeleteThis is so true! My husband rarely admits a 'failure'. In his world, he either nailed it, or it didn't matter. And he's not arrogant. He's just a dude and that's how they think! Debby is right - it's a great reminder to use when writing :)
ReplyDeleteI teach this concept to my students. I tell them instead of focusing everything on the end of term grade, focus everything on the next assignment grade. Then, the end of term will fall in place.
ReplyDeleteThat's awesome!
DeleteGreat post, Sherri. I’m learning not to bite off more than I can chew. Little goals aren’t as overwhelming to me. This is a good reminder!
ReplyDeleteYou are amazing! I'm pretty sure you're cloned :) to do all the stuff you do!
DeleteSherri, I love this idea! If the goals are smaller, and I exceed them, how gratifying would that be?! Fabulous advice!
ReplyDeleteThat's the idea! To give yourself that sense of accomplishment :) We're always so hard on ourselves.
DeleteGreat inspiration, Sherri. Everyone is always saying 'think big' but now that you mention it, that can seem overwhelming at times, and it's much easier to meet and exceed smaller, reasonable goals. Great advice. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteI hope you have a wonderful 2019 - here's to thinking small!! :) :) :)
DeleteWOW Sherri! This is so interesting. I think we always believe we have to make great sweeping changes but I love the idea of taking small, measurable steps. Happy 2019!!!
ReplyDeleteHappy 2019! Here's to a great year!
ReplyDelete