Tuesday, May 3, 2016

Patricia Johns: A Better Behaved Woman

There is a Marilyn Monroe quote that drives me crazy:

It dislike this sentiment so much because it suggests that bad behavior is "worth it" in order to get the sweet times. I couldn't disagree more--and that might sound callous, because I do understand the underlying plea... Underneath Marilyn's false bravado, under the swagger, there is something deeply sad: an unmet desire to be loved.

We all just want to be loved: by parents, by siblings, by friends, by a partner. No matter how wealthy or famous, that search for love is the same. Love me--even when I'm hard to love.

But is that too much to ask of a man?

I'm married, but that love is based on my behavior, too. If I started cheating, started hurting him, I could break that relationship irreparably. It would be possible to push him away. I can't just say, "Put up with my garbage, or you don't deserve my good times." That isn't fair to him. Nor would it be very mature of me. He loves me heart and soul, but maintaining a marriage is practical, too. He might still love me, but if I continually behaved badly, he might not be able to stay with me. It would be too much to ask.

If I'm looking for Someone to stick by me no matter what, I need to look higher. God loves me at my worst, and not because I'm so fabulous at my best, either. He is the One I can trust to love me as I am and not give up on me. And with that basic need met--being loved at my worst, treasured even when I'm hardest to be with--it makes me into a stronger woman, a better woman, a better behaved woman.

Because, at the end of the day, behavior still matters.

What does it take to make a relationship work? Christian or secular, everyone is searching for same answers. I've found my answer in the One who created my heart.

I write for three different lines in Harlequin--Love Inspired, American Romance and Heartwarming--and you'll see the Christian values I live by in all of them. This month, HER STUBBORN COWBOY is on the shelves, and I hope you'll check it out!

If you'd like to see more of my work, come by my blog! You can also find me on Facebook, where I'm always thrilled to connect with my readers.


  1. Love it, Patricia. Sometimes it seem that bad behavior gets rewarded far too much.

  2. Thanks! I think it gets called "interesting," when really it's just hurtful. Sure, it makes the Yahoo news page, but I don't think it makes for a happy life. Most happy lives tend to stay out of the news. LOL!

  3. I hate how people are meant to show grace regarding bad behaviour but that can only go so far. Actions have reactions... but treating someone with respect, being faithful and loyal i think is better for relationships.


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